Every couple has conflict so you want to use healthy conflict to improve your relationship. Even if it goes unspoken, good or bad, the conflict is still there. Many people believe that if they avoid conflict, they can escape its effects, but that’s simply not true. On the contrary, engaging in healthy conflict can actually strengthen your relationship.
Seek Professional Guidance
Most people who dislike conflict fall into coping patterns when they are faced with it. They may attack and retreat, always accommodate or deny there’s a problem at all. In couples therapy Kent County RI, you and your partner can learn to break these unhelpful cycles.
With the guidance of a professional, you can each identify the things you do that may contribute to misunderstandings or hurt the other person. Identifying hurtful behaviors is the first step to changing them.
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Hiding how you feel is not going to help your relationship grow. If you want to get closer to your partner, you must learn to be vulnerable. Fight the urge to become defensive and listen to what he or she has to say. Learn to apologize sincerely.
The more genuine you can be with your significant other, the easier it becomes to trust each other in conflict situations.
Give Yourselves Time to Improve Your Relationship
You may have heard the advice that you should never go to bed angry, but for most long-term couples, this is not feasible. If you have been together for a long time, there’s probably a lot of baggage to unpack.
This is especially true if good conflict management has not been practiced from the beginning of the relationship. You don’t have to resolve all your issues in one conversation, and trying to do so will likely put additional, unnecessary pressure on the relationship.
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Adjust your expectations so that you don’t get discouraged when your problems take a little longer to solve.
Conflict is inevitable with every couple. You can choose conflict strategies that improve rather than destroy your relationship.